I just realised..
No matter how much I tried..
I still can't move on..
I tried to find a solution to it..
Yet it's easier said than done..
I kept on chasing..
Instead of trying to use it as an excuse to 'move on'..
I finally admit defeat..
I can't 'move on' simply..
When that particular person still holds my soul..
And my mind..
And even my desire..
Struggle to find a new replacement..
Reality hits me hard when it makes me suffer more that I imagined..
When the 'old me' tries to take a step ahead..
Memories drag me 2 steps back..
How can I avoid it?
I can't confess..
As I know, I wouldn't be the one that she'll choose..
I can't be honest..
As it will only bring bad luck to me..
I can't even try..
Because the 'me' that is being seen is actually something out of the league created..
Someone who doesn't even have the chance..
Someone who just have to give up..
Who doesn't even have any hopes..
To take it to another level..
I miss that voice..
I miss that attitude of yours..
I miss that annoying trait of yours..
What else can I do?
When I can't even do anything..
To fill that emptiness that requires you to do it..